low pressure area. high depression phenomena.

i was psychologizing myself half-heartedly this morning. i have to study. i have to sleep. the computer presentation was queer. i was queer. bet the professor that i looked like a kid lost from her field trip. anyway, the morning was cold and foggy. so was my perception on things. i kept myself busy by doing homework and the project due on wednesday next week. surprisingly, i was able to perfectly execute two of the programs i did. haha. i studied them for a week and one one fortunate undyingly cold morning, i got it. my seatmate’s presentation was funny. the professor told him to make it short, so he did. he said a sentence then sat down. AHAHA.

i had a REAL lunch today. this is one of the best weirdest lunches i have had in school so far. lotz skipped lab for me. HAHA. ryan met a friend and brought the friend with him. i decided to eat at carl’s jr. so they followed. they were so good to me today, what if this happened every single day? hmm. HAHAHA. i don’t know what has gotten into me but the movies ARE a bit like real life. i didn’t really want to eat but when i got hold of my wallet and when my feet lead me to the line, such a great phenomenon entered my body. i ordered 3 pc. chicken strips AND a strawberry swirl cheesecake slice. that cost me five days of tuna sandwich haha. anyway, they didn’t want to share with me. i ate all the food by myself. not only did i feel hungrier, but i did feel worse. i wanted a chocolate chip ice cream sandwich. ­čśÉ but they weren’t listening or something was up. i borrowed ryan’s ipod just to listen to hellogoodbye’s dear jamie, sincerely me. while they were talking, earmuffs were hugging my ears and no matter how mean i spoke of someone about earphones on the dinenr table, i didn’t care. i wanted the day to be such a selfish self centered day that i kept all the noise between me and those earphones.

we stayed by lotz’s classroom and headed for my building when she got in. ryan and i decided to go to the mall – just so i can experience ditching my class. (dejavu!) i gave my homework to warren on the way out. ditching the class was fun though it wasn’t the mall experience i thought would be. we didn’t go to the mall. ryan had to be in the ksak thing by 345. the bus leaves and arrives during the 45th minute of every hour. that’s sad. we stayed by the grass. i had my back to the grass and my eyes to the sky. it was beautiful – the sky, i mean. that was the time i poured out. i didn’t cry. i’m too dreadedly dry to even shed a tear. something must’ve given my body some drought or something.

anyway, after that, i went to my spanish class. they were nice. everyone was nice today. my seatmate’s funny. kevin told me to bite my Pillows snack open cause no one had scissors. if i was in my real self, i would’ve done that. it was all review. on the way out, my other classmate offered me the last melon-O but i still had pillows and we kept to our own snacks. haha.

it’s tita gina’s birthday. i helped out in the preparation. cheska and i caught up on veronica mars. it’s so cool. come on people, watch it. kris and i had fights: poking fights (he hit his head on the picture frame); kicking fights (his leg hit my knee. his leg hurt. mine didn’t HAHA); pillow fights(he fell on the floor but he kept kicking me. kris got stuck and he didn’t get up till i pulled him – that was about 20 minutes after┬á haha. i’m going to go study really early tomorrow. i’m going to buy knotts scary farm tickets for camille tomorrow. i’m going to keep myself pretty busy while waiting for a miracle to happen. i don’t want to bore myself with bad thoughts or probable ways to be emo which lead to social invulnerability. i want to live my life like it’s so fun being me. ugh.

GIVE ME A LIFE.

cause it sucks without someone to hold on to, or maybe just not knowing if there STILL is that someone. ohshoot i have to stop rambling and dramatizing my life.

i’ll wait…but i can’t wait forever.

toodles.

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