resolutions for keeps

…cause i have someone to keep. 🙂

time robs us of our youth, or should i say, immortality. it flies by so fast that no one really knows where we’re all traversing (unless there’s a big secret agency that can tell the future or whatnot but..) but i’m not really particular about time. after 365 days and a spare quarter of a day, more than multiple oscar winning telenovela-like stories have taken place. this year pretty much has all the cracking adolescent hormonal imbalances the body can contain. if i’m going to sum it all up, it can be pretty much called THE YEAR 2006.

too much has happened and i’m all fat thankful for knowing and living with all the people i’ve encountered, and all the other people in the world (for we are in connection with one another by 6 degrees haha), for giving me such an annual feast.

every second counts, and up to this moment, i can say, i’ve had fun. rolling cheese balls and creamy pesto bread slices of fun. thanks. i learned a lot.

through the culture shocks i’ve mastered, there’s still nothing i can do about stereotypes, social climbers, down to hell trashy people, oh, and narcissism that burgeons on all over the place. but oh, who gives a crap?

everywhither, i possess a relevantly huge inclination to romanticize life. that shan’t change. i love it. the 99 stars page shall stay, for i haven’t finished it yet, and i still want to cause a good national revolution. those dreams i’ve written will no longer be in mind. instead, more will be added and those wishes and dreams will come true. i do not want to have. i want to be. i want to be the impulse that which makes people reach their goals. there’s always a path to that tiny streak of light. romanticize it, i do not care. just go and go.

maybe i’m overdoing it. maybe i’m overwhelmed. or underwhelmed. no one knows, even i do not know the inner workings of my deep nee-filled, dream-powered mind. one thing’s for sure. 19 it is, 19 it is, and i do love love. love is that which loves the people i love that’s why i love it.

one. on the way home one fortunate day, i couldn’t close my eyes and my head won’t stop wandering onto the future. what if this or that happens? would i be able to stand it? can i do it? will things go wrong or right? hmm. no worries. that’s one resolution i’m sure will make me and the people around me happy. i better stop being paranoid and impatient cause it’ll do me no good.

two. procrastination is something most shsians are proud to have practiced / still practice. i read one article saying that people set their own deadlines because they know their procrastinating capabilities. setting aside work for leisure might i say is going to stay in 2006. the bad habit will just stay there until i learn to properly handle my work and discipline my self.

three. the wish list is definitely long and not all people are willing to serve as mr. santa this year nor next year. i’ll do it for myself and save moolah. plus, i promised my mom a lot of things already. time to fulfill them, eh?

four. not a resolution but a wish: MIT. haha. i don’t know why but i so want to go there. please.

five. live it. dad said i should live more. that hurt me at first but he’s a tinsy bitsy wee bit right that i should start living again. HAHA. yea, i’ve sheltered myself too much this year. i should start playing tennis or doing something productive and sociable next year.

six. remember the starstruck line? i can’t believe i’m quoting that but heck, here it goes. dream believe survive. not too romantic about it but jeez, i sure will make the most of 2007 as i’ve done with 2006, and more. 🙂

seven. so as i would not waste any moment, everything shall be organized and set unless something magnificent comes up to awe me enough to make me forget or change my plans.

eight. the best thing ever. iloveyouiloveyouiloveyou. and the waiting continues. we know we’ll stay. just as every emo distant song goes, what we have is real. 🙂 (number eight because that’s one heck of a july. :))
nine. this year will be for my second and third semester in college. what should i do with those? participate and make the devil sure that i can best him in whichever class i take.

ten. world peace, love, liberation and happiness.

it’s all good.




with the death of saddam hussein and a scandalous act by whoever’s on the front page of entertainment weekly, some things are worth remembering.  one good example is the fact that my dad likes april boy and he wants to pop the pimple on my nose. another consideration i must remember gives me goosebumps – i might not be able to go to the hed kandi party this february.

is his death worth the death of all those innocent men? i don’t think so. we don’t justifyingly fight fire with fire as much as we kill for the killed. it’s unreasonable and immoral. who should then be the judge if there’s such a huge debate on capital punishment? god. then some other debate would take place – which god? whose god is the right god? no one knows. okay let’s settle it by generalizing the fact that there IS a god. after this enters yet a new problem. why are we doing this? do we have to fight most of the time in order to get what we want or believe what we think is proper? the answer? no one knows for sure, either. so back to the question. is his death worth? if all the related questions are left unanswered then why do we result to such a weak, unsupported conclusion?

how can we be sure of what is right if we are still capable of making mistakes?

what about it?


back to the basics.

happy birthday miks!

growing up is such a wondrous gift. oh i wish i can stop it.

if only the earthquake made the philippines closer to america, then we’d all be happy and there’d be more “rape” cases on the rise. i’ve been filtering through my thoughts for a while just so i can write anything meaningful. the problem is, i’m still stuck on my last motivational moment that i can’t think of anything else. i want to study in that different school because i’m not getting what i want in that current institution. i’m getting robbed of my intellectual neurons so often that this third world country bests that american institution. i cannot believe it. that perception makes me feel like i’ve made one big mistake. they’re having so much fun here in the philippines. the people are nicer and the food is way better. there’s a life fuller than that of which i’m having in the land of the free. come to think of it, i left that certain filipino lifestyle i’m wanting right now.

lesson learned, i cannot have everything, nor can anybody else. for years since who-knows-when, men have quest on getting the elixir of life to live forever – is that what they really want? a lot have asked about our existence but have we ever found the answer? no one knows and heck- back to me cause i’m selfish haha – i’ll never know where i’ll be happy (institutionally speaking for that matter).

one thing’s for sure though. i’m happy with the people i love and depend on. oh the spirit of the season is getting up to my head.


sincerely me.

one of the good reasons people love drama.


welcome to wordpress, Tal! complicated nga haha. im getting pissed. i want a new layout aside from the christmas one.  MILK sounds nice. or probably…the old blog. great.

food is good.

tell me it’s all brought by boredom so i won’t have to run the treadmill tonight.

supposed to be, i had something DEEP to write about tonight. conversely, the brain lost all its chemical power to fuel me with something. the sims 2 game didn’t work and i’m in desperate need of an alternative activity. i feel fat and heavy but my mind says otherwise: do not run, the treadmill will kill you. do not exercise, you’re still not too fat. what the heck. my lower back is killing me already and i miss swimming. unconnected to that is the idea that i so want to go to tagaytay because of the nice cold and peaceful atmosphere. haha. i’ll wake up really early tomorrow to jog or do whatever. for tonight, it’s all about whining and yearning for something better to do to hit me in the face or wherever.

i’m bored and time flies by so fast that boredom seems to be a cloud of wonder.

give me something to do. please.



i am such a hypocrite to my one and only SELF. hah. what to do when there’s nothing to do? do that which one hates to do. I JOGGED. i’ve seen a colossal improvement from my last near-death attempt to sweat off my inner fat. tonight, i ran for 30 minutes, shedding off 180 calories, which is relevantly better than… 60 calories in 20 minutes. eew.

tomorrow, i shall run again. the 8.5 speed is what i’m getting used to. yay. i have to get back to my 86 pound bod. HEH. i miss the ultra light feeling. parang napkin.

to the search item saying “tagalog ng sucks”, it’s sipsip. puhleeze. to the person searching with “saving moolah”, one tip, don’t waste money by smoking or drinking or partying without some good spon-b****-sor. HEH. prince of jaipur playlist? sorry don’t have it. dance with me on the ocean floor? if you’re looking for the song, it’s called THE MATING GAME by BITTERSWEET. if you just want to dance on the ocean floor, me too.

so where’s my cute dance partner? playing rf. haha. cuuute noh?

i wish mom’s right about the future of this blog.  🙂

she’s making me work, by the way. something with the consulting company oh and something with candy magazine. i wiiish these shall pursue.

since christmas is over, i’m changing the template to another season, but i’m not quite sure what this season is. heh.

time to go and take a bath. i’m stinking sweaty like snappy the stinky stinging stupid silly sultry fisssh. O.o


the holiday.

words of the great nicholas himself:

-you liar!

-papa stop snoring! papa enough! stop sleeping!

-what if there’s no sky?

-what if there are no stars?

-oh my god jesus christ!

-oh-my-god! (with the british accent)

-dede daw!

-si snappy si snappy. tidideedideedee.

it’s christmas noon and i’m waiting for someone to call. scratch that. all the waiting i did wasn’t enough so i had to indulge in the constant initiative i have in me. i called instead. merry christmas nee. 🙂

is it normal for people to sit down and just start crying with no understandable reason at all? am i growing old? it’s like every tear comprises of whatever emotion left in hand. happiness and every shallow thing imaginable is heard on those tiny sobs. grief or whatever malicious speck of emotion there is in this devil-ruled world is absolutely there in that running drop of salty water, a tear. i’m not sure on what i’m blabbing about but heck, i felt it. living today, in this present moment and not pondering on the future or mesmerizing over the past is fulfilling. they say this is the way of the yogi. i say this is how one feels when s\he is contented and happy or whatever.

oh the drama.

it’s christmas and i’m wasting my time blogging about TEARS. dad wants to go to greenhills. i want to buy the sims2 collection, so that i won’t have to download it for a week.

i’m disappointed but i’m also happy.  don’t disappoint me again, okay? 🙂

here come the tears.


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